NoTalent Fest (houston, tx)

Someone suggested that I take the worst footage from No Power Fest 2 in Houston and make it look like the fest was an awful event. I decided against this, and used the best possible footage so you all can know that I didn't have to try to make it look bad.

Here's the video.

Featuring Bobby Whittenberg with his smash hit "ALVARO!", Kim Champion humps the air because she LOVES HER LIFE SO MUCH, a baby gets trashed, and "Bone Crusher" (aka Pixie-punk fronting like he's tough) makes an appearance.

Folk-Punk is dead!

I'm -really, really- sorry. Don't watch it. Seriously. I'm sorry.



A brief post concluding and summarizing the tour will be posted soon. Or maybe not. Who cares.

Abandoned 6 Flags Exploration

When I heard that Hurricane Katrina ripped apart a 6Flags amusement park and left it as an abandoned ruin, it became a goal of mine to visit it.

Mission accomplished.

Here's some pics and a little video. Take notice, it's a glimpse of the future.






























(I AM KING CHAOS)



(on top of a roller coaster)

Vigilante Counter-Terrorism in Tennesee

Today, we met someone who has the kind of guts I'd like to see more of. Unfortunately, as per usual, the guts came along with a giant sack of stark-raving southern idiocy.

The incident ended with a Highway Emergency Response man (with chipped front teeth and the kind of hillbilly accent you wish only existed in the movies) saying,


"Well... Welcome to Knoxville."

This "welcoming" was given to us as a response to our encounter with a giant lunatic who just wanted to ask us a few questions... IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FREEWAY.



He sped passed the left side of our vehicle, which is where he noticed the bomb painted on the side. So, he zipped around in front of us, and began to slow down in the middle lane we were both in, and gradually was STOPPING THE BUS from being able to move. Our driver was honking the loud-ass air horn wondering why we were being brought to a standstill in the middle of the day in freeway traffic. As he rapidly slowed to a stop in front of our bus, our food crates fell over on top poor ol' Lil' Buddy.

"... I think his car broke down?" Lil' buddy said, hesitantly.

After a really intense minute or so, the man got out of his jeep to ask us the important question on his mind:

"Whatcha haulin?" he said, with stern, angry tone. He remained calm, but aggressive.

Our driver started screaming at him, "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!?! WE'RE ON THE FUCKING FREEWAY!! GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE WAY!!!"

He responded, "You have a BIG BOMB on the SIDE OF YOUR BUS. WHAT ARE YOU HAULIN'!!??"

Cars are speeding around us, swerving.

More yelling exchanged, but he assures us that "The police are coming. They're gunna take care of you. If you try and leave, I will STALK YOU DOWN. Just wait for the police, they'll take care of you."

Our driver started to try and drive away, and the motherfucker got in front of the bus during our lane change, and wouldn't move, so as we inched at him in the most intense game of  MAN VS BUS 'chicken' I've ever seen in real life, we were now blocking two lanes of freeway traffic in the middle of the afternoon.

I Leaned out one of the windows and screamed at the guy to get the fuck out of the way, and that's when the Highway Emergency Response man showed up, lights flashing. He jumped out of his car, rightfully freaked the FUCK out about why a man looked like he was about to lose a fight with a bus. The Counter-Terrorism Vigilante Bus Fighter Super-Redneck Jeep Man confidently replied to me "See, there they are now. They'll take care of you." He then saluted the response man, even though he was barking at both parties:



"YOU pull over to the shoulder, and YOU pull over to the shoulder!!!!"

The frustrated and befuddled Emergency Response man was certainly wondering why he was in the middle of the freeway with a crazy driver of a big black bus screaming "THIS FUCKING GUY STOPPED US ON THE FREEWAY!!! WHAT THE FUCK, HE'S FUCKING CRAZY!!! WHAT THE FUCK!!!" and wondering why an angry old man was yelling "THEY GOT A BIG BOMB ON THEIR BUS, YOU GOTTA CHECK THEM OUT!"

So he told the Counter-Terrorism Vigilante Bus-Fighter Super-Redneck Jeep Man to get in his car and go to the shoulder. So, he returned to his vehicle. And then drove right-the-fuck-off. He didn't even say goodbye, or stick around for his police-heroes to search our bus for the terrorists and bombs that were undeniably hidden somewhere inside. So, he never did find out the answer to his question which gave deep insight in to his profound, brave and challenging mind: "WHATCHA HAULIN."

The emergency response guy approached the bus, having surprisingly & essentially assessed what actually happened, and seemed ready to apologize for the existence of his entire state. He asked anyway, still a tad worked up and yelly, "Alright, now you ain't goin NOWHERE till I find out WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED!"

Our driver assured him in a sentence or two by yelling/rambling "We're a BAND and this MANIAC stopped us on the freeway asking what we had on the bus and wouldn't let us leave and then got in front of the bus and then and then and then!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Ok, ok ok ok. I'ma get ya'll outta here. Don't even worry about it. Just go on the shoulder, and I'll direct the traffic so ya'll can leave in just a second. Welcome to Knoxville."

He radioed in the license plate of the Counter-Terrorism Vigilante Bus Fighter Super-Redneck Jeep Man that he remarkably memorized in a few moments, and directed traffic so we could leave.

Counter-Terrorism Vigilante Bus Fighter Super-Redneck Jeep Man was likely armed, but none of us were about to fuck around and let this psychopath keep us in traffic much longer... the potential alternate endings for this situation are something to ponder.

I'm typing this at a "Love's" truck-stop in Alabama where the men's bathroom stall wanted me to "Call for good head. Any time. Whites only." I've been paying close attention to bathroom stall "graffiti." Apparently, it's where nazis learn to draw swastikas, and a lot of the time, it kinda resembles internet chat room arguments. Another favorite of mine was the following exchange, with each phrase having an arrow pointed at it so you knew which was being addressed:

"KILL OBAMA!"

*arrow* "Written by a redneck"

*arrow* "Written by a libral bitch!"

*arrow* "KILL OSAMA!" (with the "s" turned in to a "B" again by someone else)

Hahahahaha "libral."

I also read "I will never bow to your sheep god." followed by "That's why you'll burn forever!"

And now, Poogo eats and nearly dies from a hand-picked unidentified mushroom!








And some terrorbuscrew and I play a misfits cover in a corn field!

Story Telling, Shoplifting, Drugs, etc.

(VIDEO with music, talks, and dumbness below writing)

At the Black Cherry "infoshop" in Toledo, Ohio, Adam, Grace & I had the chance to give our presentations we'd billed as "Story-Telling/criminal mischief. Adam was supposed to film snippets of Grace's while I went to pick up Lil' Buddy, but he assumed about 60 seconds of introduction would suffice, so there's nothing to show for it. The best parts of mine were at the end, and weren't caught on film because of people who don't know how to film things properly.

Also, in Toledo, apparently we ended the music portion of our show too early, because approximately 15 kids came out to the bus, and began to bounce it, raising it off of the ground chanting "PLAY MORE SONGS!!!" This would have been on film if I wasn't scared shitless half-naked changing in to  my pajamas while trying to keep the food crates from tipping over. Anyway, they knew the way to my heart, obviously, so I went inside and played some songs... mostly to find out they were more interested in tipping the shit out of the bus than actually listening, but I don't care. Awesome.

We played a budding "infoshop" in Detroit called the Oogleberry Center, uh, I mean, Mulberry Center, and had a blast, too. We kept hearing that Detroit was a terrible wreck, smothered in drugs and crime, and we were wondering why everything was so tame. So, *a few folks who will remain nameless* had some chaps at the house aid in having the FULL DETROIT EXPERIENCE: Smoking crack. That's right, fuck you and your taboos, CRACK. The report back from this indulgence is that... unsurprisingly, it pretty much sucked. BUT SMOKING CRACK IN DETROIT FTW. Apparently, it was like... a lot of bad coffee

Also, we learned last night that some tractors have locked gas tanks, and some have pipes too crooked to get a hose in to. Back to trucks, I suppose.

In New York, pretty much nothing interesting happened. Although, Adam had promised everyone that New York pizza is the absolute best, and Ryan wants Adam and everyone else to know that -it's just fucking pizza.-

Also, a good while ago, I sloppily typed together this blog called "How To Steal From Barnes & Noble and Never Get Caught." Case in point, someone on our tour just walked out (foolishly drunk, so didn't check all the books properly) and set off the alarm. No one followed, no one even looked at them, no one gave a shit. I sit here as their accomplice updating about it on their internet. Rob them blind! Take the books, sell them on E-BAY and pay your rent or buy guns with the money! Or just read a bunch of shit so you're not as big of an idiot!

We dropped Adam off at a hospital in New York, definitely *not because he overdosed on crack, definitely NOT because of that, something nice and normal is the real reason, get me?*... He will  not be missed. Cris/Lil' Buddy/Lard hasn't shut up about how xVx he is, and how he misses all of his "nice" friends, or whatever. However, I have recently convinced him of my theory that the recent popularization of quaint young females playing Ukulele is cliche at best, and a government conspiracy against punk rock at worst. Anyway...


VIDEO!!!!!!

Adam talks about his experience in Palestine with Anarchists Against the Wall, I (travisjames) talk about my experience with the FBI (clips of why to kill cops were cut out of the lecture because of not enough cam-memory), Lil' Buddy (AKA LARD) laments ever meeting us, and Jessie gives explicit instructions on how to give a "Double Wet Williams." ... and some other junk.

Thanks to the Black Cherry Infoshop in Toledo for hosting our tunes and "workshops," and for keeping my guitar case and not writing me back about how to get it back.



SOME PICTURES:


(Basement show, in Philly)













(Adam and I ate too much Chinese food... so we kept having to lay down in various places.)




(Laying down at a coffee shop...)


(I tromped through some bushes down a hill and on to some private property and found this hidden, dilapidated structure over looking this awesome private view. We played dice and drank there.)


(How dramatic... barf!)


(Mocking The Penguin)


(Tried out "Hipster Travis." I wasn't feelin' it.)


(If only we were this good of friends in real life, hahahaha.)

Pictures and junk...

Here's some pictures, I guess. Some are cool. 


(The next update will have a video with selected clips from our talks/stories/"workshops," and some show footage and junk.)

Youngstown:
 
So, we were just ab out to start playing a show in a badass park in Youngstown, OH, but cops came and said our bus couldn't be parked there. So, we rounded everyone up and drove to the nearest Walmart and had a blast playing in and out of the bus.





(The newest addition to the TerrorBusTour, FryHugs, AKA Lard, AKA Lil' Buddy. We look forward to forever destroying his reputation.)








(So, I asked someone if they'd ever had a show in a walmart parking lot before, and to my surprise they said yes. It was, after all, Ohio. So, I turned on my flashy-lights I had hooked up to the back door of the bus, and said "Well, have you seen THIS at a Walmart parking lot show before?!??" He hadn't. Take that, Ohio. Later, he admitted that it was, at least, the most fun he'd had in a Walmart parking lot. SCORE. Can't wait to tell the grandkids about THAT lifetime achievement.)

PITTSBURGH: Through some brush hidden behind a park is an abandoned and slightly overgrown tennis court that we played. It was a blast, till the popular local went on right before me so everyone left but the oogles. So, I promised one of them that if if he raged to my set I'd smoke pot with him later even though I don't smoke pot. Then when he asked me to follow through with my promise, I lectured him about how he was throwing his life away with drugs and that he should be straight edge, even though I was totally drunk. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Workshop Summary

Not enough internet time or battery life to keep making shit constantly, so here's a brief update about New York.

Between songs, I did a workshop at ABC No Rio in New York.

Here's the re-cap:

"This one time... politics. So, the other day, I was all... cops."

*started song*

I hope everyone learned a lot and are better people from my profound words.

<3travisjames

Guerilla Tape Exchange/Dig Up Her Bones

(SCARY VIDEO & PICS AFTER WRITING)

PART 1: GUERRILLA TAPE EXCHANGE

While in gridlock traffic on a freeway, we saw two crusty-type punks in a car next to us. They were, of course, enamored with our amazing bus. So, when the opportunity arose, Hugo ran out in to the free way traffic (with cars moving all around) about 5 cars up and brought them an Adam and the Ancient Gods CD (it was the only CD we had on the bus, sorry guys!) and a TerrorBus Sticker with the blog address on it.

Just when we were reveling in the excitement of having done this and thinking it was over, one of the punx ran back to our bus and brought us their demo tape! So, be sure and check out our rad new friends in the band CAPE OF BATS!





Part 2: DIG UP HER BONES

There must be some charming devil looking out to help enable our ill wills.

We had planned for a while to dig up a grave on tour, but had no shovel, and were wondering when a cemetery was going to be conveniently located next to us.

We went out siphoning one night in a construction quarry, and not only got about 50$ in diesel, but found a shovel (and a 2nd gas can for more siphoning)! The very next night, we drove out to a undisclosed place to sleep, which had a cemetery conveniently located next to it.

Long story short of that night, you don't know romance until you've had cemetery dirt licked off of your fingers.

It couldn't have been more perfect.

The video below has some songs, and then some TERRIBLE DARKNESS YOU'LL NEVER FORGET!



MONTANA:











MINNEAPOLIS:










(Adam, being IRRESISTIBLE.)